The Low Carb Diabetic

Promoting a low carb high fat lifestyle for the safe control of diabetes. Eat whole fresh food, more drugs are not the answer.


Welcome to the Low Carb Diabetic forum,have you signed up yet? if not then sign up and join us in the low carb community today!

    House of Commons cafeteria runs out of knives

    Share
    avatar
    graham64
    Member

    Status :
    Online
    Offline

    Male Posts : 2929
    Join date : 2014-08-10
    Location : Lancs

    House of Commons cafeteria runs out of knives

    Post by graham64 on Sat Jul 02 2016, 23:24

    The House of Commons cafeteria has asked MPs if they’d mind returning the knives they currently have sticking out of their backs, as they’ve run out.

    Saying there’s been ‘a bit of a rush’, catering workers are currently scouring the Houses of Parliament looking for MPs bodies from which they can retrieve their cutlery.

    The cooling remains of dozens of Members of Parliament are currently draped over furniture, lying spreadeagled in corridors and slumped in neglected corners of the building, and hundreds of knives need to be retrieved before dinner time.

    The carnage started yesterday when Michael Gove used a roughly-sharpened prison shiv to do over Boris Johnson, leading to a cascade of defenestrations and stabbings as the floodgates of years of pent up frustrations spilled out into open warfare.

    Michael Gove himself is understood to be currently desperately fending off a steak-knife-wielding Theresa May with a sandwich platter in the Pugin bar.

    Meanwhile, heating engineers at the House have asked if Jeremy Corbyn would mind returning the boiler plate he’s currently got stuffed down the back of his jacket as it’s playing gyp with the thermostat.

    “It’s all very well them bumping each other off and warding off attacks with tea-trays and whatnot, but some of us have jobs to do,” said House Facilities Manager Simon Williams.

    “There’s a trade delegation over from India, and MPs have been sticking each other with the cutlery we’re supposed to be giving them a nice reception with – ironically in order to get into the reception.

    “And if anyone has seen the heavy glass paperweight that was in my office I’d like it back, as it was a present from my wife. I’m told John McDonnell has it, and he was last seen headed to Angela Eagle’s office.”

    http://newsthump.com/2016/07/01/house-of-commons-cafeteria-runs-out-of-knives/


    _________________
    I'm a skinny T2 diagnosed 4/4/2008, a high calorie LCHF diet and one metformin a day A1c 6.2 and no complications.

    Proving the LowCarb sceptics wrong for over nine years,

    Not all cherubs are Angels  Wink nor all diabetics Bonkers  Rolling Eyes

      Current date/time is Thu Aug 24 2017, 00:03